Save My Breath

I am trying to save my breath.
Not because I have nothing to say,
but because I have said
a lot of things
that did not need saying.

Mostly in my head.

Little commentaries.
Quick judgments.
Half-formed stories
about people I barely know,
Judgements of me.

And honestly,
that is a strange way
to spend a life,
and a breath.

Because breath
is not unlimited.

It comes in quiet counts,
in unnoticed numbers,
and I have been spending mine
like I have an eternal supply.

We do not.
I do not.

So now,
I catch myself.

Mid thought.
Mid judgment.
Mid,
Who do they think they are?

And I laugh a little.

Because,
Who do I think I am?

Someone who forgets
that everyone is carrying something.

Someone who also wants grace
on my messy days.

So here is my practice:

Pause.

Breathe.

Choose softer.

Say less
when less is kinder.

Say more
when more is love.

And save my breath.

For the things
that actually matter.

Like being human
with other humans.

It took four decades to arrive at this place,
catching my own sharp thought,
and letting it pass.

Not making it harder
than it already is.
I choose to exhale.